Almost midnight

It's always easier for me to blog at the end of the day because I don't think so much about what I want to write. I just do. It's liberating to do so. Anyway, Jotham and I went shopping (yay to early bookout for New Year) and guess what, Zara sale has started! I am, of course, dying a little inside since I am basically broke and have to scrimp and save until my first paycheck comes in! Which is an exciting event.

Almost a grown up, almost.

White borders

Sleepovers (with not much sleep involved) are always fun. + I love this polariod. Would be even better if it's the original vintage square one! But thank you Cal <3

That's not why I came to blog today. I received good news today and I am beyond ecstatic! After holding on and waiting and waiting for what seems like ages, I've finally gotten a job offer. And it's far better than what I've expected ($1.3k before cpf? Seriously?) or what I (resentfully) had almost settled for. God sure knows how to do things and has a sense of humour. So hello 2012, bring it on!

Oh right, my Blackberry died a few days ago on Christmas Eve on my way to church service. So I'm now surviving on a barely responding BB and a work phone for well, work and emergencies. Tomorrow is Friday which is also book out day!

On me, on you

I miss my soldier boy so much. But thankfully it's already Wednesday!

"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want" Psalms 23:1

Count your blessings

Is it me or does it get progressively harder to make friends as you grow older? Acquaintances and work friends, sure. But real friends to keep, hardly. Sorry to sound so jaded when I am only 20 haha. Anyway, these friends I've had for about 8 years now and I thank God that although we've all grown up, we don't grow out of each other. That's something I can be thankful for as 2011 comes to a close.

Just hung up the phone with Jotham and it's time for bed now, goodnight! 

Always brunch time

Our love for brunch will never cease. It's the second time we've been to The Dempsey Brasserie (our first time was here) and I still love the place! We came here after Jotham's church Christmas church service on Sunday and hey look! First few pictures of the boy with no hair ^^ still looking mighty fine, soldier!

Merry Merry Christmas

Christmas this year was better than expected. Christmas Bash, sleepover, brunch and Christmas dinner at Jotham's. Too tired to blog about it now, another day!

Three days away

Meeting the girls (+ Clifford) tonight for our Ikea Christmas dinner lol. This is a really weird and unglam picture of us (me especially hahaha, don't know why we did that) but who cares? Ugly is the new beautiful. Pretty pictures are getting boring. #justsayin

Wander with me

My concept of right and wrong might not be as clear as black and white and may consist of varying shades of grey but there are some things that I do have a clear line. When people challenge me on that, or don't look at the issue the same as I do, I get really defensive. I fight tooth and nail and in the process, I fail to realise that the people I am challenging are the people who matters the most to me, people who dares to step up and tell me I am mistaken (whether I am or not, that's not the point) and I end up hurting them. I risk sounding cheesy here but afterall, people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.

Katong laksa (how authentic, I have no idea) with Jinguo at Roxy Square yesterday. Headed to Gan Eng Seng hall for YI Camp service which was filled with sweaty (note: very smelly) campers but God was undeniable. It must be God if people you don't even speak to (ever) lay hands on you and pray the exact prayer you needed to pray and hear. :) By the way, I finished every drop of the laksa and wished I could lick the bowl. I was that hungry.

I don't know if anyone even read this space but just in case there's anyone, goodnight.

Dreamers

It's 1.50am on a slightly rainy Tuesday morning and here I am, searching for film cameras on Ebay to buy. It just occurred to me that I'm 20 and that time isn't going to stop for no one so I'm going to start documenting my life & everything that happens around me before it's too late and I'm old and 50. Besides, I haven't had a single picture of Jotham with his bald head since he enlisted (it's been 5 weeks!) except those shameless, topless pictures in my Blackberry and if they ever see the light of the world, I would probably be dead.

P.S That's a (really bad) picture of us in Jan this year and I thank God that I have lost weight since then. Oh God, that's really hideous.

Weekends

Weekends are the most precious time of the week. And this weekend was priceless. I basically glued myself to Jotham's house because the poor boy fell sick. I know it's just fieldcamp but omg, he came back thinner and looked like he actually came back from war with all the scars and sickness. ): Army is a phase of life that we will have to work through somehow.

I honestly don't understand how J can be so smitten and sure of his love for me when I'm so silly and insecure half the time. Thank you God for graciously giving me someone so wonderful and thank you babydoll for being the awesome human being that you are. Muahz

To the moon and back

Nothing is as awesome as sitting at a rocky wooden table by the roadside of Geylang gorging on durians, mangosteens (is this how you spell it??) and sipping coconuts with your family. Although it gave me a tummyache the next morning, it was worth it.

Random picture of a sleepy kitty at Jotham's estate which I've grown to like a lot. Although it does look like a demon cat sometimes. But it's so lazie like us sprawling on the bed on a hot afternoon...... Meh. I miss Jotham. Fieldcamp week will be over in a jiffy!

Twentieeeee

I (finally) turned 20 yesterday! Siyun was super duper nice to have brunch with me at The Plain and I really, really wanted to go there for such a long time! + this girl really knows me best, I mean, just look at the presents! Cute and totally my style. <3 

We even look alike (somehow) HAHAHA thank you sweetie <3 truly friends for life.

Then my shoe broke while walking (lol) and we went to Topshop to buy new shoes & a sparkly velvet party dress for myself! It was too adorable and too fitting to pass up! Then I proceeded to Timbre @ Old School to eat up a storm with LLL clique (minus Evan and Dk) and of course, we ordered the duck pizza. And some weird but really tasty sunnyside-up pizza!

Song dedication was pretty much a fail as their text didn't show up on the screen but it's the company that mattered the most to me. So grateful to have my babies take time out to celebrate and spend the day with me xoxo muacks to all. Oh, and people who texted or called to wish me happy birthday, I am so blessed. 

What is hidden in snow comes forth in the thaw

After desperation comes inspiration. It's so true. Journalism isn't quite working out for me (but you can read my fashion articles at Fever Avenue here, if it pleases you) so I'm considering my options. I wish I had thought of my options earlier instead of being so stubborn. Maybe I was just silly. But anyway, options.

I don't consider myself to be super independent, I do need to talk to people about my feelings and my frustrations. I just can't deal with them on my own half the time. I need to cry, need to go a little crazy and prolly freak out a little before I am capable to deal with my issues. My go-to person in such times, who also happens to be my bestest friend and lover *ahem* and gives the most sound advice in the whole wide world, is not around much except 5 mins every night. Honestly, how does one summarises 24 hours of feelings and frustration and happiness in 5 mins. Plus it's a two-way conversation so make that 2.5 mins. But ok, baby steps. One day at a time. So far so good.

Independence don't happen overnight. Neither do success. Freelancing as I go along. Taking baby steps. It's all part of the shaping process. Plus I have a big God. I know I'll look back at this low period in my life in the future and laugh and say "hey, it was essential".